At our church, small groups are an important part of the Pastor’s vision because it is through close relationships that we encourage each other and are held accountable. There are three small group “semesters” (winter, summer and fall), and this summer, I’m going to be leading a new small group based on Proverbs 31 — a passage that describes the unique characteristics of a godly wife.
There are so many voices in the world today that are against the institution of marriage — both overtly and subliminally. Marriage has been romanticized to the point that it’s easy to forget what the real purpose of it is. At the same time, marriage is seen by some as archaic and even unnecessary.
There are so many littles things that get in the way of marriage for some people. We hear a lot about married couples getting into ruts and focusing so much on work and other obligations that they forget to focus on what God intended for marriage to be.
A recent realization I had — and it was kind of a hard one to swallow — is that my purpose in life may not be to do some great thing myself; my purpose might be to help my husband fulfill his purpose in life and do great things.
“A wife of noble character is her husband’s crown, but a disgraceful wife is like decay in his bones.” – Proverbs 12:4
This goes along with another realization: David and I aren’t equals. As much as the media tell us that men and women are the same, we’re not. Yes, women can have a career and make more money than men, but that’s not what matters. What matters is what God intended when He created us.
Sure, this is incredibly humbling, but the Bible doesn’t tell us that women have to stay at home and do nothing but obey her husband. Proverbs 31 describes a godly woman who is productive and praised, and it is going to be the focus of my small group.
“Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised. Honor her for all that her hands have done, and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.” Proverbs 31:30-31
The woman described in this passage earns the praise of her children and husband; she brings her husband good and not harm; she helps the poor and needy; she works hard; she takes care of the household; and she has wisdom, strength and dignity. Her husband is respected at the city gate, where he also praises her.
These are the things we should seek. This ideal is what we should keep in our mind — not a picture drawn by society but the description in God’s word.
While Proverbs 31 will be the focus of my small group, we’re going to be reading My So-Called Life as a Proverbs 31 Wife: A One-Year Experiment…and Its Surprising Results. The author shares her experience trying to be the Proverbs 31 wife — the ups and downs — and the lessons she learned. I highly recommend this book to any woman — young or old, married or hoping to one day be married. It can help provide a deeper look at the Proverbs 31 passage and how it can be applied in our everyday lives.